Polytix

jezza-aparted

As I write this we are two days away from the 2017 General Election to decide who will be in government for the next 5 years. I’ve been so caught up in it all it’s almost all I’ve thought about since this election was called. And in a few days it will all be over and an outcome will be known.

In some ways I miss the days where I didn’t care much about politics. It was so much easier to just think that all politicians are useless and to not really mind who won. I used to just have a favourite leader and would back that person based on how stately they seemed. So I liked Blair and therefore liked Labour. However I preferred David Cameron at the time to Gordon Brown and wasn’t displeased at having a change in government in 2010. By 2015 I hated Cameron but also didn’t think much to Ed Miliband and so didn’t vote. I’ve never voted in anything except for the EU Referendum. But in 2015 during the Labour leadership contest between Andy Burnham, Yvette Cooper, Liz Kendall and Jeremy Corbyn I got drawn into politics in a massive way. For the first time ever I saw a politician who really resonated with me as he did with many others. As I’ve matured I’ve become far more liberal with my views and have ended up fully believing that left wing politics is the way forward for everybody and Corbyn is the first leader I’ve ever known to seem to really believe in what he says and what we hope for. It was a surprise to me that after starting off the leadership contest as an outsider he seemed to quickly become the favourite as people listened to him and started to support him. I was one of those that swiftly became a member of Labour to vote for him. And since then he’s had to battle the media and his own parliamentary party as well as the government constantly and he’s done it admirably. I despised the fact Labour MP’s tried to oust him despite massive support from members. He deserves a united team and a fair crack at a General Election before anybody should even think about a change in leadership. And here we are. After nearly two years of supporting the movement we are two days from judgement day. Was all of the support and momentum just for nothing?

Well, it seems like that may be the case. It isn’t easy to fight the constant bullshit from the papers. Social media has been doing a great job of balancing it all out by constantly challenging every little piece of propaganda. It’s actually kind of fun at times although at other times it can drive you crazy. I’m starting to think a free press is maybe not such a great thing. People are too gullible to have papers freely printing total lies. You should always be able to give opinions but I don’t think printing something that isn’t a fact as a fact should be allowed anymore. The truth should be all that matters and if people have the truth and all of the relevant information about a topic then they should be able to make up their own minds. Yet that often isn’t the case. A paper will print a lie and say it is the truth and people will believe it. We’re all capable of doing our own research yet many of us are lazy it seems. The amount of people that believe Jeremey Corbyn is an IRA supporter who is anti-British is astounding and I’ll challenge that shit wherever I see it. Gullible people lap this up and believe in the Tory propaganda and so are sheep marching towards their own slaughter. There are three types of Tory voter from what I can see. 1) The rich and powerful who want to keep their taxes low whilst keeping wages low and they do not give a crap about the majority of people or public services since they only selfishly care about themselves and the people around them. 2) Gullible idiots who actually believe that Corbyn is a maniac and a lunatic and the Tories are sensible and looking out for us while dealing with a difficult financial situation that conveniently seems to be lasting forever. 3) A reasonable human that defies all possible explanation as they aren’t selfish and aren’t stupid but for some incomprehensible reason seems to think that the Tories are better for everyone when compared to Labour. This third category are a strange breed to me as it means I am misguided and on the wrong side and so having done my own research I have made wrong assumptions and need to seriously have a re-think about why I am so stupid. Yet this seems not to be the case as every statistic I come across seems to support the fact that the NHS is underfunded, the national debt is rising, there is a housing crisis, there are many cuts to the police force and all of this is under the current government who also want foxes to be ripped apart for their own pleasure.

Despite these facts as soon as the election was called people wrote off Labour’s chances and a massive Conservative win was predicted with a much increased majority. My own constituency is an ex-mining community that was battered by the Tories and yet it is widely predicted that the Tories will win here for the third straight election. The area doesn’t have many millionaires so it means I’m living in a place where the majority of my fellow humans are gullible or misguided. It drives me mad to constantly debate the issues with some of these people and be unable to make them see sense. For when it comes to this topic of who should rightly win this election I have never in my life been so sure of anything. I’m so sure that we all need a Labour win. I believe in it more than I believe that smoking is daft and illogical. I believe in Labour more than I believed in remaining in the EU and I was 99.8% sure that that was the right thing to do also. I believe Labour are good for the British people in the same way I believe water is good for the people. It is totally black and white for me. Theresa May keeps saying we have a clear choice and she is damn right there. It’s like being asked if you’d rather have a hug or a punch in the face. Except more people are begging for a punch in the face rather than choosing a hug. When in the voting booth it says as much about a person as when looking in the mirror. You will find out who you really are. Many people have an inner bastard at times. And the inner bastard comes out in that booth for all who vote for that toxic bunch of fraudulent and lying arseholes.

What is mad to me also is that Theresa May during this election has said nothing of substance at all. Her party offers nothing. They even freely admit that they will take more from everybody with total faith that the people are so suitably brainwashed that none of the malice they come up with for us will matter. She bangs on about having a strong hand to negotiate the best deal for Brexit and yet she cannot even debate her opponents or answer any questions from the public. She had a meeting with Jean-Claude Juncker about Brexit and it didn’t go well at all. Further evidence that she lacks the finesse these talks will require. This election is about Brexit but not in the way she claims it is. She knows that when we leave the EU in 2019 times will be hard and the British public will feel it. She knows there will be a backlash against the current government and from 2019 to the 2020 election there wouldn’t have been enough time to sweeten up the Sheeple again and so the Tories would have been booted out emphatically. This election was called during a time that Labour were perceived to be weak and so that after Brexit she has until 2022 to butter up the masses again. The Tories will never let go of this power and every rich asshole that prints propaganda and gives out millions in donations are there to see that the rich and powerful always remain that way to the extent that the gap between the elite and the working class is getting wider all the time. Eventually we have to fight back and why not now? Why not on Thursday upset the apple cart and actually narrow the gap? We’re all born equal and we can take nothing of this world to the grave so why are many people struggling to have a roof over their head and buy food while some people are partying on a yacht 24/7 whilst being propped up by a working force that is grossly underpaid and undervalued? It isn’t right and a Labour win is the peaceful and easiest way to address this issue just a little tiny bit. The alternative is eventual bloody riots. People will not let the NHS crumble. All we need is for the masses to wake the hell up and the system comes crashing down. Surely the elite must realise they have to filter some of that wealth back into the system via tax? Hard work should be rewarded definitely but it’s just ridiculous at the moment. The elite don’t seem to understand that without a population capable of buying the products or services that a company offers they wouldn’t be in the lofty position they are fortunate to find themselves in. And yet they under fund the NHS and sell parts of it off. When we all fucking pay for it and need it. Everywhere you look there is this rhetoric of needing to watch the pennies. Everywhere you look there are cuts and closures. Everywhere you look the price of living is rising faster than wage growth. And despite all this the debt is growing and bankers are taking massive bonuses while we continue to bomb all hell out of the Middle East and then moan and blame immigrants for the occasional psychopath blowing themselves up on our land when it’s the immigrants that are carrying the damn NHS on their backs. It’s just too much bullshit to tollerate and I can’t even put it into a consistent argument without going into a tangent due to some other injustice that comes to the forefront since all of the bullshit is weighing so heavily and crushing us all from every bastard angle.

Also usually in a choice like this I see a right option and an “interesting” option. Remain in the EU was right but Brexit is a huge change and was the interesting choice. Trump is a terrible President but it’s at least interesting. The Tories are not only wrong but also utterly boring. Corbyn is not only right but also a change and a breath of fresh air. It’s the interesting choice. The anti-establishment option. It’s an added bonus. If he fucks it all up (which he won’t) then we’ll go back to some more central Labour leader and go back to the boring Tory vs Tory Lite elections. But for once can we not see if we can ever have a progressive socialist in power?

Basically, the Tories need to go. Their whole manifesto is a total shower of shit. And Jeremy Corbyn is the answer. He reminds me of how the Jews treated the old JC in some ways. Jesus was one of their own. He preached peace and love and wisdom. And the people hated Him for it and had Him executed. That’s what it’s like being a working class dude in Tory Britain today. One of our own has come to help us out and he has a 40 year record that is untarnished. Every single time he votes on anything it is the admirable choice he goes for and even when his choices have been unpopular at the time they have proven to be right later on as the guy is ahead of his time. He’s truly noble and honest. He’s loyal and hard working and the strongest leader I’ve seen in politics. He listens to people and genuinely has compassion for the people. In his constituency he is untouchable. That says a lot right? The people that he’s been working for over the decades consistently vote him back in and nobody gets close. The Labour members and grassroots members of momentum back him unequivocally. And yet many of the people that he would help would nail him to a cross given the chance. People call him a traitor and a lunatic and soft and will vote for the enemy.

But maybe they won’t. While there is still time there is still hope. And the fact that the gap in the polls has been closed so quickly speaks wonders about the fact that when people hear the message they are receiving it well. It was a foregone conclusion but maybe it will be closer than they thought. If Theresa May doesn’t extend her majority that will be a form of victory. In the face of ridicule  and with predictions of a 100+ majority to go through the campaign and not secure a strengthened hand will at least make her look stupid and show her arrogance was misplaced. But we need more than that. We need to fight for every vote in every constituency. And I hope people think tactically. If the Liberal Democrats are comfortably better placed to take a Tory seat than Labour are then I hope people vote for them instead. If you’re a Lib Dem fan and yet Labour are the only chance of winning the seat in your constituency then I hope you understand that your vote for Lib Dem is wasted there and join forces with Labour voters to ensure we win there. There are many parties vying for the progressive vote but only two parties for the nasty vote and one of them is UKIP who are being read their Last Rites. So voting tactically is crucial. Every Labour, Green and Lib Dem voter would prefer there to not be a Tory government. I would be happy for a coalition government between these parties but Corbyn has ruled this out. So the only outcomes for the election are Tory majority, Tory-lead coalition, Tory minority, Labour majority or Labour minority. A Labour majority is highly unlikely. So the most likely and maybe only possible non Tory government is a Labour minority. And the only way this happens is if the progressive left rises to smash these bastards and take as many seats as possible. If you see The Sun or Daily Mail lying (lol) around the staff room put it in the bin. Put all Tory propaganda in the bin. Keep all their activists busy. Challenge anything that isn’t factual and spread the Labour message.  I really hope we fight the fucking system and give them the middle finger.

I could write until my fingers drop off about how every view Jeremy Corbyn has seems logical, about every lie in every paper or about every fucked up policy Theresa May has (dementia tax? You’re serious?). But the information is out there. The facts cannot be changed. The truth is unwavering and it cares not one bit for any spin. And so I may as well wrap up this political rant that I meant to be something that I put some thought into so as to maybe persuade people to vote Labour but I was unable to do anything but show how bloody angry and passionate I am about this. That will have to do. I am nervous and excited and exhausted mentally with regards to June the 8th. All I can do is speak the truth that I know to whoever is around to hear it and vote and encourage others to vote. We’re so powerless individually but collectively is what matters. There is only one party that can win and that also truly cares about the collective and I hope the majority of the collective realise this come Thursday. If you’re on the fence then properly have a think about what’s best for you, your family and friends and the nation and then make an independent choice. I am fairly sure that the surge in Labour polls will make this a close contest but we will likely fall short unless something truly spectacular happens. And if it does then I’ll have been happy to have been the tiniest part of it. So for the good of the many and not just the few I urge everybody to consider voting for Labour in this election.

Peace and love x

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Words Unknown

I’ve always loved to learn new things. I miss school and college and uni and having lessons and homework and all of it. I guess I’ve never stopped learning though as I’m always reading about things. The curious itch to know information will never leave me and I’ll always have this enquiring nature which is mostly a blessing but sometimes a curse. It’s a total pain in the ass when you’re trying to sleep and end up reading about 50 wikipedia pages on various topics and a whole load of reviews about a film you’re considering watching until the birds start singing and dawn breaks. Mostly I just can’t help it though. I just have a need to know and it doesn’t require me to ever actually use what I do learn. It goes nowhere except to satisfy curiosity in the present moment. However it would be nice to use what I learn and it has been a while since I’ve given myself a challenge. I’ve also always wanted to learn a new language and like many other people it is a life goal. If you add this life goal into a pot with enjoying learning and needing a new challenge and hobby then the requirements are fulfilled and the path to being bilingual begins.

At school I did French and some German. The love of learning always lead me to  doing extra classes so I did German as an extra class in break times and after school for a couple of years but never did it to GCSE level. I did French throughout school and enjoyed learning it and felt pretty good at it as a 16 year old. I knew I’d never need it though and that was that. It fades away. Although many phrases and verbs are still knocking around in my head somewhere. And I can still count in French. It would be so great to be totally fluent in another language instead of just knowing the basics. First you need to decide which language you feel like adopting. Since I’ve already done a load of French in the past there are pros and cons to choosing it. I would probably pick it up again quite quickly with the base knowledge I still have. So that would save time and effort. However, it’s the least challenging. More challenging would be Spanish as I’ve never done any Spanish at all. However since it stems from the same Romance language as French did it would probably be the second easiest. I don’t want an easy ride and Spanish seems so obvious as it is a popular language. I thought it’d be great to learn something totally crazy like Finnish but having looked at just how bat-shit crazy their language seems I think it is too challenging and I’d give up in frustration. When you weigh up all the pros and cons of all the languages you realise you’re only really left with French, Spanish, German, Italian and Portuguese as the realistic whilst also desirable options. And with the exception of German each of those languages is a gateway to knowing much of the others too. So sod it, I’m choosing the obvious. Spanish it is.

In the end a big factor in choosing Spanish was football. La Liga is massive and I often watch it on some daft stream where the commentary is in Spanish.I follow some Spanish speaking footballers on social media and so see Spanish there too  It sounds like a beautiful language. Every English speaking person knows a whole bunch of Spanish words already and they all just sound pretty cool to say. Even words that are almost the same in Spanish as in English just sound more poetic somehow. Like La Policia or estupendo. Imagine writing Spanish poetry – it would flow so well. I’d love to visit Barcelona and I’ve never yet set foot in South America and would love to travel around there someday. It all just makes sense to learn this language and be a Spanish speaking dude. I have far off aims of writing blogs here in Spanish too. It’s going to require a lot of dedication and determination though but after a few days of studying it a bit I’m finding I enjoy it. I’ve changed my facebook language settings to Spanish and been trying to read BBC’s website in Spanish. Sometimes I can get the gist of what is being conveyed and other times I’m clueless and just guessing. Also been listening to ASMR in Spanish, though they talk so fast. It’s all good fun though and a cool hobby. I’ve got hours of podcasts to listen to, the Duolingo app on my phone, loads of online resources via Reddit and Spanishdict translate. Just need something to enable me to practice writing exercises now really. And a whole load of time.

I thought about seeking out some kind of real class to go to but I’m cocky enough to think I can do it without. Words are just patterns and I don’t think you need to be taught much to learn a language unless you totally lack motivation or it breaks many of the rules you’re used to from your native language. Spanish has a couple of curve balls but nothing major from what I gather. Masculine and feminine is something I got used to from French. Putting descriptive words after the noun takes a little getting used to but not too difficult. And there are a few crazy accents and symbols. Like this sonofabitch letter: ñ. Also I’m starting to think I’ll never be able to roll my r’s but I’ll keep trying like a moron. Why won’t the tongue just flap about when I tell it to? How do other people do it? No idea but it’s part of the fun. It is starting to drive me crazy though as I sometimes do it but can’t control it. I must have watched 30 YouTube videos on how to do this trilled r thing but it’s so hard. In English we never need this sound so often lose the ability to do it. I remember as a kid doing this machine gun sound with the tongue and that is apparently close if you were to do it more softly yet I now can’t do that machine gun sound that I used to do all the time. At first I thought this trilled r was just a cool part of the Spanish accent but have come to realise that you actually need this sound to be able to distinguish between certain words. For example Pero without the rolled r means “but” and Perro with the rolled r means “dog”. How very frustrating. But all good fun. AarrrrrRrrRRrggghhhhh.

I don’t expect to be able to be decent at Spanish for a fair while. So it all depends on staying motivated to do it and there’s a definite chance that after a few months I realise that it’s easier to not bother and give up. Right now though it feels like something I really want to do. There’s something about seeing how certain words relate to English and other languages. It makes you realise how connected everyone was when these major languages started spreading through regions and countries during conquests in the past. It’s good to appreciate other cultures and other people. And there have been so many occasions where I’ve been abroad and just felt totally lazy for only speaking English whilst the locals also speak decent English to us as well as other languages to other tourists. If some people can speak many languages surely I can fit two in my brain. There’s a lack of a need for many English people to speak another language since we’re lucky enough to have the rest of the World who are either native speakers of our language already or have become fluent in it as a second language. We’re lucky there. But also missing an opportunity to gain a cool skill and unlock the potential to communicate with many other people around the globe that we wouldn’t have been able to do otherwise. And since I often feel like running away from the town I live in and heading south for some more sun maybe I’ll run south all the way to Spain. Probably not. But living abroad for a while is another life goal. Not that I ever actually achieve many of these life goals. Let’s just learn the language first. And then write a Spanish blog. And maybe visit Barcelona and order una cervaza.

Anyway. That’s my latest daft idea. Hasta luego 🙂

 

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Review of Ridiculous Ramblings

 

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Before Facebook, in another life time, there was a website called Myspace. I loved Myspace. The internet seemed to spring up out of nowhere and change from a bit of a gimmick into the essential tool it became in a very short space of time. It was like one day I was at school unsure of what to do on the internet and trying to think of a cool website to go to before waiting five minutes for it to load and then not much later we’re all constantly online and connected and wouldn’t know what to do with ourselves without it. The full impact of how much the internet had changed things became apparent when I was 18 years old and had moved away to Liverpool for University. We all had MSN Messenger and though we all lived far apart we could talk constantly when we were in our separate flats through out the UK. It still wasn’t like how it is now where this technology has improved and evolved and now fits in our hands but it was still mind blowing at the time.

Then came social media. Myspace and Bebo were around before Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Snapchat and all the rest. Myspace was just incredible. We all had our own website page and we could decorate it however we wanted, upload pictures, post comments, post bulletins, have our profile songs, fill in quizzes, send private messages to friends. And write blogs. Before this blog here there was that blog there over at Myspace. These words were written from the ages of 18 to 21. Eventually Facebook came along to compete with Myspace and although I got a Facebook profile I was so loyal to Myspace until well into 2008 even when it became obvious that Facebook would overtake and destroy Myspace. But there came a day when I felt compelled to leave Myspace forever as I wanted to close a chapter of life fully and firmly. I’m pretty sure the date was the 15th August 2008 and on this day I went to see friends in Liverpool for a week determined to look to the future. The way I got rid of Myspace ensured I could never log back in. It was attached to my University email which was about to be closed since I’d left University by then. I changed my password to a random line of letters and numbers and wrote them down on paper so that I could then type them back in to confirm the password change. Then as I walked to the train station to go to Liverpool with a cigarette I burned the paper so I’d never know the password and never be able to get an email to recover the password since I was about to lose access to the email address. So dramatic. Typical of me.

None of that would really matter. It’s only a social media site and anyway, everybody had gone to Facebook now. What really mattered to me though was the blogs I wrote. There must have been over 100 and though I remember many of them were total crap where I just moaned about lack of motivation and worries for the future like I do now, at the time I felt like I’d also written some good things about how I felt and come to many realisations. I always feel that through each blog post as you go through time you can see yourself slowly evolve and grow as a person. The Uni years were a huge chapter for me. But all was cool. Myspace still existed and though I could never log in I could still go onto my Myspace page and view the blogs. Though I never did really visit and re-read them I planned to one day copy them all and save them somewhere else. But then Myspace changed it’s whole layout and became some really crap music site that nobody cares about and all blogs and profile layouts were gone. That sucked. I was so annoyed. I guess once we share stuff on a website it belongs to them in a way and they can do whatever they like.

Recently though I decided to attempt to get back logged in and see if they could be recovered as they must be somewhere. I had to fill in a form and explain the change in email and wait for a few days but they sorted it out and linked me back to my old page. I logged in and it’s sad to see Myspace is what it is now. But they have an option to request your old blogs for download. Obviously I clicked that option. After a week they email me to say they’re available for download and yay I have them back! My plan was to post them all here on a separate page tab of this WordPress blog but I thought I’d re-read them first. I’m so glad I didn’t just post them without re-reading them because holy crap I was nuts back then. It gave me a lot to think about and I’ll try so sum it up here now.

Firstly I was surprised at how many blogs I’d wrote. I must have been writing them every couple of days at some points. The next thing that I couldn’t believe was that in the earlier one’s I wrote many words in text speak. That is something that I hate and I would never do now and never thought I ever did do in the past but there it was. Doing was doin. Something was sometimes sumfink. Also, I cannot believe how much swearing there was. It shows a lack of vocabulary really. The thing is you’d think I was at the peak of my intellect then since I’d only just left school and college and other than Maths I’ve done nothing academically since and had no reason to write other than messages to people and blogs. Yet I re-read what I wrote and it’s like I was totally dumb as hell back then. And naive. I thought I knew it all. I was self-centred in a really annoying way. I was brutally honest and gave too much away. It’s clear that I’m a different person now. It’s for others to judge if we change for the better or not but I did not like much of what I read that I’d wrote.

One thing I never do now is sit down to write a blog without a clue about what I will write. If you have nothing to say then just keep quiet. Sometimes I have things that I want to write about and that is when I write. Back then I remember sometimes just feeling like I’d write a blog for something to do so I’d click on the option to write one and just sit there and think of sentences to write. And so much of it is just mundane, self-centred crap. The earliest posts are raps that I wrote. I read them now and cringe. The influence of Eminem shows far too much. The rhyming is nothing special and there’s that honesty that is just too much. Some things are better left unsaid but I didn’t care for that back then. It’s that rap influence mixed with my youthful naivety that gave me the attitude of wanting to “be real” and “not giving a fuck”. Now I doubt many are truly “real” and I most definitely do care what people think. Surely we all do and I know I did back then though I felt like I needed to act like I didn’t.

Some of the blogs are decent snapshots of what was going on at the time and brought some memories flooding back. That was cool. Though I get angry at myself now when I read about how I knew I should care more about exams and start thinking about a career but was too busy getting wasted all the time and laying around doing nothing. At that age you feel as if you have such a huge amount of time ahead of you that you can afford to piss around and future you will pick up the pieces. Well present me is pissed off with past me for not giving a fuck about future me. It’s interesting that sometimes I seemed to realise that if I don’t feel ambitious whilst doing my degree then maybe my ambition was already dead. Some self-awareness seems to creep in throughout these blogs. Some nihilism and philosophy start to creep in throughout the anger and confusion. Themes of anti-theism start to dominate later blogs. I attempt to write chaotic things where I contemplate what it would be like to lose grip on reality. Some of these blogs still interest me now and it is interesting to see how I went from mostly writing rants aimed at people and the World and gradually seemed to calm down and become more reflective. It’s evidence of growing as a person which we all do during that period of life.

The present me has changed his mind when it comes to how much of our thoughts we should put on social media. I think it’s daft when people are so wrapped up in their own world that they almost put every waking thought out there for everybody to see. Being self-centred and narcissistic is quite a lame characteristic to indulge in. It can go too far when we’re tagging ourselves in every step of our day and living life through a lens rather than our own eyes. And the past me reminded me of these character traits that I dislike so much. Every few days just going on about problems like anybody cares. It’s like people on Twitter just spewing out nonsense believing there are legions of fans hanging on to every word and just waiting for the next episode in the drama of life. But life is mundane. Nobody is really interested in what we’re up to or what we’re going through or what we’re thinking. That’s not cynical – it’s just truth. We scroll down our social media homepage and barely pause except to look at a gif of a kid getting knocked over by a dog so we can have a chuckle. We may throw a few “likes” out and comment on a few things but the vast majority of what every person and every page posts is just garbage and doesn’t impact our lives in the slightest. It’s good to realise this as we grow as people. It keeps us humble. Don’t moan because there are people worse off than you and nobody cares. Don’t brag because your life is mostly shit and nobody cares. Stay humble. Keep your darkest secrets and inner-most desires to yourself and outwardly give support or occasionally criticism to those around you. That is how I now feel it is best to behave on social media. Not like back in the day when I didn’t give a fuck and would attack and attack like a keyboard gangsta and moan and grumble and whine and bitch that the world didn’t understand me. Being understood is overrated. I felt a need to defend myself to a world that barely even registers I exist let alone gives a damn about the alleged complexities of my own daft mind. It’s an absurd thing to do to defend oneself in such a way. Nobody’s watching anyway and that’s true for us all. We spend too much time worrying about what others think not realising that others are just thinking of themselves and worrying what others think of them. We don’t give others much thought and yet think that is not the same when it comes to you because you’re special and people are shocked by you or confused by you or amazed by you. Nobody cares. I’m disappointed in myself that I didn’t grow up and learn this stuff more quickly. But I was young and foolish as we all are at some point.

Still though I am glad I wrote them. It’s good to compare and contrast. You get to see where some parts of you faded away and where some parts of you began. Some of them are so cryptic I barely even know what I was writing about now but there is the odd interesting point I make in the vast ocean of overly dramatic insanity. I think I will post a few of the ones that aren’t too cringe-worthy or incriminating. I like the philosophical ones I did. But most will be locked away in the labyrinth. I’m now pretty glad that Myspace took them all down. It was pretty cool though to take a trip down memory lane and though we should never live in the past it’s ok to visit from time to time and I’ve always travelled back more easily with words than pictures. And that’s why I write these things. It’s all about the snapshots. One day I’ll be 40 years old and re-reading these and cringing but remembering and comparing and contrasting. We’re always learning and ever growing. Some people say never look back. But how do you know which way is forwards if you don’t know where you’ve been and how do you know what to leave and what to take with you?

 

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Idealism Is Not Ideal

lovechemist

February 14th 2017. Valentine’s Day. I always have the same little rant about this calendar event but in reality if things were different for me with the whole love thing then I’d probably be a stupid, romantic asshole for the day like many others. It is a con and a load of bullshit and just people conforming to the norms of society for the benefit of retailers and restaurants but I guess if it brings some pleasure then what the hell eh? Buy a card, and the overpriced-and-certain-to-die flowers and some chocolates and the teddy and have a meal. It’s all good fun.

Youth fades for us all and the blessing and curse of this is that we gain experience and wisdom. Wisdom is sometimes a hindrance but there’s no denying truth so it must be accepted. I’ve always had this stupid dumbass belief in an idealistic type of love. Like it’s a once in a lifetime thing that will blow your mind and change you forever. All of the films and all of the songs are right. There will be a fateful day where you have a random encounter with The One and everything will make sense and you can be happy for the rest of your days with all problems and triumphs shared until the end of time. Even possibly beyond this Earthly existence. Where an unbreakable bond with your soulmate completes you as you build a home and a life together. I guess for some currently under the spell this has so far been true and maybe it will last forever. Reality is what your mind makes it. If you can believe it then it can be real. Our experiences dictate what we can believe. It can cause a loss of belief. And then you start to see the whole thing as a joke. You see the emotion for the temporary insanity that it is as chemicals are firing off in your brain when in the presence of The One. You understand the delusion you give yourself and the trap that you willingly walk into to ensure that you have children with this other human you have chosen against your will. This doesn’t mean that you have to be pessimistic about things. You can enjoy the madness of it all whether you see an illusion or something real. A joke does not have to be truthful for it to be funny or enjoyable.

I admit though that I preferred it when I believed in the illusion. The potential pain is a risk worth taking for the chance at something that will fix everything. Even though nobody can really fix anything for anybody but themselves. There are benefits though when shedding this idealistic philosophy of love. For example I no longer believe that it’s a once in a lifetime occurrence. It’s rare but can happen multiple times in a lifetime. And the craziest thing of all is that if or when it happens or has happened again I believe you will forget to remember that it’s all an illusion. It will be the same old shit that you ended up believing last time but you’ll forget and believe that last time was a mistake and not the real thing but this new thing is the first time ever that it is actually totally the real thing. Just like when we’re born we forget that we’ve been born before and life is just a circle and we’ve been through all of this infinite times already yet we believe that this life is the one true life and all we have. It’s also similar to a panic attack. When we’re in a panic attack we think we’re having a heart attack and are about to pass out and die any second. This one is not a panic attack this time like all of the others – this one is real. Until we remember that panic attacks are powerful illusions and we calm down and laugh about it until the next time. Only the current panic attack matters. Only the current moment matters. Love is panic inducing.

So we carry on. In search of something we’ll never find until we find it and not realise it because that wasn’t what we were looking for. And when we find what we weren’t looking for we’ll swear to ourselves that we were looking for that exact thing, that exact person with all of their qualities and flaws. It’s all random and inevitable. If you feel alone that will change because your own brain will change your reality. If you’re with The One then there is still a potential Two, Three and Four out there if it all goes FUBAR with One. There is something comforting about the loss of belief in favour of truth. It can all feel so powerful when we’re caught up in the spell. But whenever you step on Lego with bare feet that too can feel powerful in that moment. That too shall pass.

So I know more than I ever did before. When younger I thought I knew it all like I was born with a fountain of knowledge and all of my beliefs were unwavering and would stand the test of time. And time did indeed pass until I realised that I knew nothing and still know nothing and will never understand or know much about anything but maybe just knowing a little more is good enough. In thirteen years time I could look back on these words and throw my head back whilst roaring with laughter at the absurdity of it all just like I can look back thirteen years now and do the same. Wisdom is relative and we reach certain branches upon the tree of knowledge at different rates. Some hang around on the lower branches content and happy swinging about with no direction whilst some race to the top and fall and crash back to Earth. None of it really matters. Every direction is neither right or wrong.

I found that dreams can die but they can also be resurrected. Despair can overcome hope but never truly win. I can feel things I’ve felt in the past in present situations and it gives hope at the same time it terrifies me. I can feel myself slip into my old ways. My hands urge to write absurd things. My brain dreams up vivid and crazy dreams. Aimless hopes gain focus and direction as chemicals are exploding against my will. I realise that love is bullshit. But so is a panic attack. Both still convince us of their power in the present though even though we can look back on the past and see through it all. Both also give an absurd hope for the future. Resurrected dreams can die too but we can choose to ignore this piece of knowledge. All of this unique crap has happened before and will happen again. The words we write, the songs we listen to, the films we watch all prove this. Every human throughout history has been captivated by love multiple times. Maybe the next time you feel that magnetism around another human will be the one hundred trillionth time it has happened since we evolved into our current format. But for you that doesn’t make it any less powerful or real right now as you look at this other human and pin all of your hopes and dreams on them whilst hoping they don’t stamp on them, laugh and then run away without a care in the world. And today we celebrate the madness of it all. Fuck the shops and the meals and the presents and all of that shit. Be stupid and dare to dream for a while. Nothing will be ok. Nothing is ever ok at some point. But right now maybe it is and good luck to you with it. Good luck to us all. God knows we bloody need it.

Happy Valentine’s Day fellow believers in absurdities x

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Subplots and Backstories

I know it’s over
And it never really began
But in my heart it was so real

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Therapy session 413.

We all have a story right? Some kind of back story that is an accumulation of all that we have experienced and has paved the way for who we are in the present. They give us our memories and we’re able to act based upon how things have gone for us before. We have a continuous story from when we’re born to now and it plays like a film with low points and high points, successes and failures. Well what is my story?

It feels like I don’t have one. I feel like I’m just a minor character in somebody else’s story. In a novel sometimes the viewpoint of a minor character shows us a few scenes away from the main characters to show some other side of the overall plot. I feel like one of these minor viewpoint characters and I’ve reached the end of my little story arc and have no further part to play in the main story. In a way this gives me a scary sense of freedom since the creator of this story seems to let me continue to exist despite not having any further purpose. Maybe I can move off and create a spin off story and exist all on my own. But it doesn’t feel like I can as I’m still anchored in the pages of the main story and characters cannot just pull themselves away from pages. We’re stuck in the stories we’re in. Or so it feels.

If I was to write the entirety of what I think is my back story then it would basically show conclusively that I am nowhere near the star of my own show. Chapters and chapters would be dominated by the viewpoints of the main characters where I am not even around at all but instead I’m off page probably in some pub somewhere doing nothing significant. And yet this is supposedly my story. If the main viewpoint characters in my story were asked about their own back stories then I would barely feature. I’m just a background character there to give my few lines of dialogue every now and then. I’d get a few pages maybe if I’m lucky. And then on with the main plot.

It’s strange to think this way and I’ve tried very hard to re-wire the absolute mess of chemicals in my brain that have enslaved me. I want to break away and have my real own story where the current main characters are just minor background characters that have no real influence over my thoughts or my life or my plot. It’s so difficult for me to do though. I guess I’m obsessive. Sometimes I just love a mystery and absolutely need to figure it all out and cannot walk away until I’m satisfied. Sometimes I feel that having invested so much time and energy into the story of others I cannot just walk away from it all like it was nothing. No matter what I ever do from this point forward I’ve spent too long in the story of others and have been corrupted by it. Decisions I’ve made were based on this story at times. I feel like I’ve totally betrayed myself. Yet I didn’t really have much choice neither. It’s always been difficult for me to branch out and do my own thing since I lack determination at times and have no will power. I end up following the dreams of others rather than my own dreams. I follow rather than walk my own path. My own path seems so lonely and difficult that it’s easier to just follow what others do and stay in their story. I’m somebody’s friend. I’m somebody’s co-worker. I’m somebody’s family member. I’m a minor character. And who am I really and what am I about? I’m nobody and I’m not about anything.

Well I’m tired of it. To quit the main plot gives me temporarily no purpose at all and literally nothing interesting to think about or solve. Can a minor character even truly break away from the magnetism and aura of the main characters? If the main characters need help do I not just exist to guide these characters along their journey? How will I ever disobey what I feel programmed to do? And why am I on the wrong side in this story? I feel like I should be on the side of the good guys yet it’s a grey world and though we’re all morally ambiguous at times I feel like the characters that have allowed me to be a small part in their story are pretty evil and heartless. For some reason the villain in the story has been able to fool everyone into believing they’re righteous. And there’s an army of minor characters that are hoping to play a bigger role. Do I want a bigger role in this story? Truly no. I don’t want to be in it at all. If I had one wish it would be to have never been a character in this story in the first place. Go back in time and nip it in the bud quickly and leave it. I wish to go back to earlier chapters and erase what my character did and said. And felt. I wish to have been able to see the beauty in other minor characters through-out my little subplot along my little story arc. But some characters have this powerful arcane and dark magic and they’re able to cause massive disturbances in the lives of others. There’s nothing good about them. A narcissist cannot give any kind of resolution to anybody and they definitely can’t make themselves happy either. All of the main characters in the story believe that they are the story. Others fuel this because they’re all blind to the truth and get caught up in the mysteries and darkness and feel like they can elevate themselves along side these main characters and have a life just as full of drama and excitement. Fuck that.

This is what the truth is. Nobody is special. Fuck your story. It isn’t half as interesting as you think. You think you have answers? You fucking stupid cunt. You elevate your own image in your own eyes to the point where the only way you can go is down as you fall crashing back down to Earth. Beauty fades and energy wanes as time goes on. Illusions reveal themselves to those who pay attention. Today’s drama is just another snippet of dialogue in distant future scenes and it’ll get the same kind of attention as the day’s football results. These characters believe their own hype far too much and I’m so disappointed that I ever believed in this lame crap too.

Thoughts, feelings, dreams, songs, poems, nightmares, social media updates over years, art, philosophy, films, writings, sharing many scenes, a god who thinks he’s funny and likes to torment me…all of these things combine to show how much of a joke the whole thing is. There is no justice. But I’ve punished myself mentally for so long. I can’t forgive myself for my own mistakes but I guess I need to try to. I know that every now and then the pain re-surfaces and it’s because I go looking for it. I re-remember everything and every fucked up emotion I’ve ever felt weighs me down again until moving off these pages seems impossible. It’s like I need to keep reminding myself how stupid I’ve been. I’ve been to some dark places mentally. These words are not even a promise to myself that I’ll change as I know that for a long time scenes will continue to loop over in my mind late at night and there’s nothing for it other than another beer and a hope that one day I will have some hope again. I did feel peace for a while. And then I lost it again. The only thing that changed was my own ability to accept everything that had ever happened and let it all just be. See, I understand that our own thoughts create our own world and my own mind can write it’s own story independent of the past. I understand it and I accept it. Obviously I will carry on with my quest to be the star of my own show. Where I feel kind of anchored in my own world with my own set of characters and my own totally unique story arc that will begin, have a middle and some kind of resolution. We all need control over our lives and it is a terrible idea to ever let anybody else have control or too much influence. I need to break free of these shackles. I once talked about a metaphorical box where we can lock memories inside and forget them by burying it deep down into our subconscious mind. I think I accidentally shut myself inside the bastard and buried my own damn self. I talk about freedom a lot because “my fences are found inside of my head ’till I put these words in this rhythm”.

That’ll do. I know much of what I just wrote probably makes no sense but thoughts aren’t easy to process sometimes. It’s easy when you’re writing to persuade someone of something. But when you’re trying to persuade yourself it gets messy. I’ll sign off by raising a can of Carling with a wish for new stories. I’m a stupid pawn in a stupid game of chess where a stupid asshole is moving me round the board. But there’s still a chance to get to the other side and become something new. Much love to every person who’s ever felt like a minor character. And fuck you to the major characters with your narcissistic stories. Fuck you

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A New Blogpost

“Shyness is nice, but shyness can stop you
From doing all the things in life
That you’d like to”

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2016 ran away and became 2017. 1992 was a quarter of a century ago. It gets faster and faster and I really don’t like to think about it too much. It makes it all the more important to appreciate the moment we’re in like all those spiritual people say we should.

Incidentally 2016 was almost the best year for views on this little blog I do. It didn’t deserve to beat 2014 though. I like the things I wrote in 2014 more than 2016’s words. This blog is now 5 years old. As time goes on it will become more interesting to look back through them and in some cases wonder what the hell I was on about at the time. I still wish I had my blogs from myspace. They’d be cringe worthy but I’d be able to time travel back to early 2006 then.

I hope 2017 will be a great year. I never really plan much for a year. I just sit back and let things either happen or not happen. There are a few events planned that will be fun and so far March is heavy favourite to be the best month of the year with a trip to Latvia in the pipeline along with another crazy week of beers and betting for Cheltenham Festival. I also need to think about current job and living situations. On the one hand I can’t be bothered to look for, apply for and potentially obtain a new job. Life is mostly easy right now with weekends off and everyday a lie-in. Not doing too many hours and not having to travel and just about enough money to not be totally screwed. I have plenty of time to sit around day dreaming and reading and playing games and having a few beers with a few pals. But at the same time the job is dreadfully boring and also really annoying me now. Why is it employers accept and put up with lazy employees but expect a good employee to work miracles? It’s demoralising. Plus I really should actually do something in life. Society says I should be ambitious and strive for more and I can almost hear people’s thoughts about me these days. They think I’m a failure and I guess I am. Sometimes I wish for a job that would silence their thoughts. Even though I guess “their” thoughts are really just my own thoughts conveying my own disappointment in myself. Easier to blame society and others though. But yeah, I will be doing a bit of a think and having a job hunt soon again. And I’ll also have to consider where to live. I’ve been thinking about the south coast. I’ll carry on thinking about it a while and massively flirt with the idea before eventually dismissing it and staying where I am most likely. Staying is boring but also easier. I’m such a lazy bastard and have no drive. I have to accept this. Or try to change it. Sometimes I can smack a Huel shake down me and listen to Death Grips full blast and believe that I’m going to pack all my troubles in my old kit-bag and smile, smile, smile and move on out of this comfortable and mediocre situation but then other days listen to The Smiths with pizza whilst happy in the haze of a drunken hour totally content with mediocrity for at least life really isn’t too bad.

Wow, what a paragraph. I only wanted to say that March was going to be a good month and my life story fell out onto the page. Oh well.

Many times in life I have toyed with the idea of attempting to write a novel. It’s a life goal of mine. I love writing so much but I don’t think I could ever really be an author. For one you need a lot of luck and there are far more talented people than me that never get published. It’s crazy to think there are people that rejected JK Rowling and Harry Potter. Also to be an author I imagine is a hell of a lot of work which I’ve already established I cannot be bothered with. But I’m not really looking to get published if I did write a novel. It’s only my life goal to write one and have it exist in the world. You can easily self-publish these days. But the life goal requires the story to only exist on my laptop to be ticked off. If anybody wanted to read it maybe I could e-mail it to them. First though I have to write the bastard and that requires inspiration and plot ideas. I have a few ideas. I know what the book will be like if I ever wrote it. It would kind of be an easy way to get my own stupid thoughts out into the world (the world likely actually just being my own laptop) using the characters as vessels. I guess I’d just mix my own self into the characters a bit and hope that would suffice to cover up the limits of my imagination. And then there’s the plot to consider. I sometimes have ideas about interesting situations that I’d like these characters to be in. Great stories always amaze me though in how authors manage to wrap stories up with satisfying endings and I struggle with that. I can imagine a situation coming to some kind of peak and then just not know what should happen after that. Anything could happen and I would just get option paralysis and not know what to do for the best. I know I’d never want to write a happily ever after type of ending and the kind of ending I would want to write would not appeal to most people. I’m realistic about the fact that hardly anybody would enjoy my novel and that is why I have no ambition with it other than to write it. I do have a little idea about getting stuck with plot ideas though. Ever since reading the novel called The Dice Man I’ve been so intrigued by the idea of using a dice to dictate what one does in life. Unfortunately I do not have the conviction to use a dice to tell me what to do next in life. We’d mostly only give the options to the dice that we’d like to do anyway and if the dice told us to do something we really didn’t want to do it’s unlikely we’d actually do it. However I could totally use this idea when writing a novel. If I get stuck with characters or plot maybe I could use the dice and then roll it and let the Universe tell me what to do next in the story. I love the idea of that and the consequences are acceptable when it is only fictitious characters that could have their lives ruined. It could make the story a whole lot more random and organic. Random things happen in life that we have no control over and most stories are so blatantly telling a story (obviously) that it seems restricted and inorganic unlike life. George RR Martin goes against the grain here and has created a world where it really feels like anything could happen to anybody much like real life. But most authors pull their characters through event after event to tell us a story and that is awesome most of the time. My idea is probably stupid for serious authors. Why kill off a character that you and a potential audience will really like? It would be so much fun though and plot twists could be far less obvious if you as the writer don’t even know they’re coming yourself. You could even ask people you know to give you an option to add to the dice. Maybe you could try a few options and then decide on which one feels right and best. As ever this is all just idle thought unless I actually start to write it. Which knowing me is unlikely. My idea was probably conceived, existed and died all in one go in this blog and will never grow to be a healthy novel in nine months time.

So I have plans to write and I also have plans to read. Just finished reading everything I wanted to read by Brandon Sanderson finally. I know that he is an author I will follow throughout life and he’s a great author to be a fan of since he has such a prolific rate of firing out quality stories. Multiple releases per year. The guy is a machine. Currently I’m reading Philip Pullman’s His Dark Materials trilogy and I’m enjoying it so far. I have a reading list which I’m sticking to and relentlessly going to be getting through it from now on. The fantasy novels alone will take me into 2018 and maybe further so this list is ridiculous but I do bloody love getting sucked into another person’s created world via their words. It’s a welcome distraction from the mundane and sometimes crappy world of our reality.

But time to stop being negative. My new resolution (not really for the new year but a resolution nonetheless) is to do more things that I want to do. It’s so simple and yet I often find that I don’t manage to achieve it. Sometimes I absolutely have plans to get out and do something and yet don’t ever get round to doing it. Sometimes this lack of doing things leads to drifting away from people. It’s such a sad thing to lose touch with people you were great friends with but I guess it’s just how life is. I have the bubble of a bullshit personality which is my wall up around people I don’t know and it takes me a while to build a rapport with a person. Once I do though it’s cool. I feel I’m a good friend to most. I like it when you have that kind of connection where you have many inside jokes and just know what the other person is thinking without them having to say a word. But these connections can still drift away from us if we don’t make an effort to stay in touch and I’m terrible for not just picking up the phone and seeing how somebody is even if I am actually wondering and planning to get in touch. So so silly. And before you know it they’re a friend from the past and you’ve downgraded each other to acquaintances. But then there are some where you just know that you’ve both changed too much due to seeing each other less and drifting. It’s just life. People change depending on their environment and when paths diverge too much it is likely the rapport you once had will be broken when you meet up again. I have to learn to accept that better. You can’t force things. Connections can be strong if you fuel them regularly but distance can pull them apart. New people come into life at the same time as people leave and that’s the right way to look at it. They say that our group of friends mostly totally changes every 7 years or so so I’ve done well to have a few that have gone beyond that and I do appreciate it. All of this ties in with my resolution. Sometimes I’ve just got to do better to keep in touch with family and friends and sometimes I’ve got to be just be totally ok with drifting from people that have drifted. It’s all good.

I’m kind of in the mood to write all day but think I’m going to leave it in favour of writing again here pretty soon. There’s many things I feel like writing about but don’t want to smash it all into one ridiculously long blog and then write nothing again for a couple of months. I mostly want to write about actual topics in this blog for 2017 and beyond rather than the diary type ones. I go over old ground when I’m talking about general life and so should only write one every few months at most. Sometimes though a topic grabs us and makes us angry or intrigued or inspired or whatever and those topics are what I want to write about. I do go through periods where I don’t feel like writing about anything and I guess that’s fine but I really should write here more as it often feels good to get stuff off my chest. When I’m angry about something it is better to let it out always and I do like to vent.

2017 has started off much the same as every other year whereby I re-realise that time is a man-made construct and has no actual meaning in our reality. Life just is and there is only now. The past and the future are all just ideas and they do not actually exist. I can wallow in the past and obsess about the future but it is all a waste of energy and leads to missing the moment. So I wish you a happy 00:21am on the 11th January 2017 and many other happy moments in whatever present moment you’re reading this in.

Namaste

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Futuristic Food

“Look to the future now – it’s only just begun”

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Over the last few years I’ve been giving much more thought into what I consume than I used to. For most of my life I simply didn’t care but as we get older I guess we all want to try to eat healthy foods and feel better. Or we at least have phases like that. I attribute much of how I’m feeling to the foods I’m eating. Also over the past couple of years I’ve annoyingly developed some digestive issues that I won’t go into. I know I have a long term problem of some sort and yet I hate going to the doctors so it’s guess work. But I’m 85% sure that it’s not life threatening and it’s probably something lame like being sensitive to gluten or something equally ridiculous. It’s common stuff according to various forums across the internet. It has lead to me being quite conscious of what I eat and was a major factor in me becoming a vegetarian, then a meat eater again, then a vegetarian, then a vegan, then a meat eater, then a vegan and currently a meat eater again. All of that messing around with my diet has probably not helped matters. And with that said it’s now time for the next experiment.

I’m obsessed with the future and how far we can go as a species. This is why I think Elon Musk is the greatest man alive. His ambition with Space X, Tesla and SolarCity is so impressive. With all of the technological leaps over the last hundred years I think it’s quite ridiculous that cars are still running on petrol and diesel. It’s so 20th century. Computers and smart phones have evolved and become so amazing and efficient and yet we’re still talking about miles per gallon as we pollute the atmosphere with ancient technology when it is plainly obvious that electric cars are the future. The whole car industry needs to get fully on board with this and stop holding things back. Musk is ensuring that they have to keep up and eventually they will stop slowing progress down once the market shifts the way it absolutely inevitably will do. That’s an exciting prospect. And then there is NASA who have been so interesting in the past but are boring me a little bit these days. They talk about maybe another mission to the Moon in 10 to 15 years time and they have a vague plan to maybe go to Mars at some point. Musk is building a system that he plans to use in the next decade to permanently have a settlement on Mars. It seems like after already going to the Moon in the Sixties it’s kind of lame that we haven’t been further especially seeing how in almost every other aspect we’ve greatly improved our technological capabilities. So I applaud Elon Musk again. He’s almost single-handedly dragging us forward and pushing us to reach our potential at a faster rate than we currently are.

So what has that got to do with food? Well food is another area where I feel we are lagging behind where we could be. It’s obvious that a Vegan diet is better for us as a species when it comes to the environment and our own health. If not a fully Vegan diet then we at least need to go further towards that end of the dietary spectrum. And yet many of us are still munching on utter crap from McDonald’s. Slowly killing ourselves whilst putting a strain on health services. It’s another form of holding us back. At the same time I believe that we need to move to an at least mostly Vegan diet I have to acknowledge that I am a very lazy individual. I struggle with being Vegan due to wanting a lot of convenience when it comes to preparing meals. Too much chopping stuff up, measuring things out and washing stuff up for my liking when Vegan. Always having to go to shops to buy fresh food. Always having to read labels. Having to plan meals and getting bored of eating the same things due to them being easy and Vegan. After a few months of it I totally fail and end up buying a pizza to put in the oven and then I’m back in square one. Today I stumbled onto something I’d never given much thought before but seems like the answer to so many problems and also to me seems like the future of food. It’s a shake that ticks all the nutritional boxes called Huel – human fuel.

I read about this product and was reminded by my own inner debate about whether or not to buy a Kindle a few years ago. There are pros and cons. The Kindle makes so much sense and is so convenient but you can never beat the feel of a good book in your hands right? Huel makes so much sense and is so convenient but you can never beat the feel of steak in your mouth right? Similar argument I reckon. The human body is a clever piece of biological machinery. It gives us incentives to do the things required to preserve our species. Breathing is good. If somebody chokes you for a while and then allows you to breathe then it will feel rather good. The process of creating babies feels good to ensure that we do it. Very nice of our bodies to use these incentives for us. Food is the same. It tastes good and is desirable so that we put in the fuel that we need. If the fuel that we need was already in our stomachs then the desire to eat will pass. We can bypass the whole pain in the ass process of having to buy and prepare food and then washing up with a freaking spoonful of powder. This seems like the future to me. Especially as this Huel has all of the recommended nutrients we need so we don’t need anything else at all. It has the calories, the proteins, the carbs, the fibre, the sugars, the minerals, the vitamins. All of it. Plus it’s Vegan. I understand that many people will hate this kind of thing as they enjoy food but to me it sounds too good to be true and the thing that I’ve been looking for over the past couple of years. I’ll be able to be lazy and have more time with which to be lazy. And I should in theory have more energy since it has all the good stuff in it that I’m also too lazy to make sure I have. The first order even comes with a shaker and a t-shirt which is nice of them and the cost per “meal” is apparently £1.45. Many times I’ve felt hungry but not had any food in that I fancied preparing and didn’t really want to go shopping or get a takeaway and this product could have been on my shelf ready for me to just add water and shake to get a full and insanely nutritious meal in no time at all.

I guess this kind of thing appeals to gym goers as a supplement as well as busy people that don’t have time for lunch. But it also appeals to futurists like me. It gives people more freedom as they can still eat normal meals and have whatever they want when they fancy. But I’ll feel better knowing I’m getting the good stuff, saving money, doing my bit for the environment and washing up less. Also hoping it is at least part of the answer to whatever stupid digestive problem I have since some Vegan food in the past was most definitely a trigger also. These are exciting times we live in as the future is here and we’re limited only by our imagination. Electric cars, cities on Mars and nutritious meals where all you do is add water. Bloody genius. When it arrives I’ll give it a go and then give it a review on here. Hopefully it tastes good and hopefully it works well. Who knows, maybe it can replace the Turkey for Christmas Day this year haha.

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